When we read the Bible through the lens of gender roles we are missing the mark. One-sided authority, one-sided submission, one-sided respect, one-sided voice creates unhealthy, oppressive relationships in the home, and in the church. The church is in the process of examining gender roles. Consciences are being set free, and yokes of slavery are being removed. Gender Roles of male authority and female submission is patriarchy.

Gender Roles is much bigger than “women cannot be pastors or elders”. Women have been denied a voice, authority, agency, autonomy, logic and emotions, gifts, spirit, and the Holy Spirit being her spiritual leader. 

I used to think, and teach that “women cannot be elders or pastors” was God’s way of protecting women from God’s wrath. God’s wrath would fall on the male leaders instead. For women in this system, there might be a measure of comfort in this thought. For men in this system, there might be a measure of fear in this thought. But my thinking was wrong, because God’s wrath has been taken away at the cross. In Christ, men and women have been set free from God’s wrath to use whatever gifts the Spirit gives us to build up the body of Christ, and to help out our neighbor as we are willing and able to. And as our neighbor is willing and able to receive from us.

Our conscience has been bound by a select portion of scripture. You can read my post on 1 Corinthians 14, where I discovered that women are encouraged to teach the whole church. In my post on 1 Timothy 2 & 3, the Greek word for authority is a domineering ruler, not a general goodwill authority. The Greek words for overseer is gender neutral, but the English is translated with male only pronouns.

To hear from other voices in the church, here is Kara Angus @karamellslp on Twitter:

Patriarchal church leaders knew that the freshly liberated women of the 80’s would no longer go for the idea that they were inferior to men. So they marketed their benevolent patriarchy as the “happy medium” between oppressive patriarchy and equality. 🧵

Benevolence by its definition is: altruistic, compassionate, charitable and good hearted. Patriarchy (with benevolence added on) survives on the illusion or promise that men/ thought leaders will strive toward these ideals. It forgets that men (like women) are sinners.

Benevolent patriarchy really thrives on women buying into the illusion. Women most follow these rules to be in good favor. They must quiet their voice and go along to get along. IF they accept these rules, they are rewarded with safety, rescue, protection and acknowledgement.

Patriarchy “with a twist of implied benevolence” expects us all to fill narrowly prescribed gender roles. It boasts of ignoring cultural influences even while infiltrating & imposing its rules on evangelical culture. It ignores exceptions to the rules and eliminates human agency.

Early church fathers said women were inferior to men in all ways- intellectually, morally, emotionally…Benevolent patriarchy says “women are not inferior but are different” from men. Secretly they believe women are inferior but for public image, women are equal but different.

The patriarchal crowd needs women to be a part of the system. Women’s “differences”, obedience & submission add to the success & purpose of the mission. But remember, it all depends on women joyfully accepting their place as recipients of benevolent patriarchy for it all to work.

Benevolent patriarchy is just oppressive patriarchy rebranded. It’s the opposite side of the same coin and no matter which way women flip, it still lands the same way. And truly: there is no charity, good heartedness or compassion on either side of that coin.

Benevolent patriarchy = a deep level of mistrust and condescension directed towards women that is labeled as “love”. It is confusing, nauseating, frustrating and heartbreaking to be the recipient of it.

The scourge of patriarchy was broken along with all other sin at Calvary so why are we running around trying to salvage and reinvent it as something good and redemptive?

Patriarchy by any other name still smells like…power, control, oppression, subjugation, and evil.